Travel tips to make multi-generational vacations stress-free

by Kathy Buckworth

Travelling with your grown kids and with your grandkids can be the best family bonding experience. But before you get too teary-eyed over the memory making that you’re going to be doing, take a step back and reflect on the family vacations you took with just your kids.

We used to say, “If you’re only miserable half the time on a family vacation, you’re winning.”  Whether it’s teetering toddlers on the precipice of a mountain, or tempestuous teens slamming hotel room doors at 2 am, we have to remember that while we might be leaving our day-to-day routines and some of our troubles behind, we’re taking one thing with us we can’t leave behind. Our own personalities.

The same is certainly true for us when we travel with our “kids” and their kids. If your ever-so-helpful parenting advice isn’t well received at home, it’s probably not going to fly when you’re actually flying with your grandkids. Let the parents still be the parents and consider taking a secondary role in managing the kids’ behaviour, even when you’re pretty much on public display during your vacation outings.

Eight travel tips from Grandma Buckworth

Before you pack your bags for a two-week European vacation with your kids and grandkids, I’d suggest you try a smaller, closer to home trip to find out what it’s really like to take the show on the road.

I recently took a three-day getaway to Blue Mountain Village, in Grey County, Ontario (about two hours north of Toronto) with my daughter and her four children, aged five, four, two and four months. Here’s what worked for us:

1. Before you book a hotel, consider the sleeping arrangements first. Who can sleep with whom, and how much quiet and privacy does each person need? If the kids aren’t sleeping, no one is sleeping. We had a two-bedroom suite (at Seasons) with a pull-out couch in the main area. I slept in one room with the two-year-old, who was in her own playpen with a tent cover, and my daughter slept in the other bedroom with the four-month-old, in a bassinette with a cover. The two boys, aged five and four, shared the pull-out couch in the main area. There were some shenanigans, but we made sure to wear them out sufficiently during the day.

2. Put the kids’ schedules first. I don’t care if you always do your Wordle at 10:00 am, or your yoga stretches at 11:30 am, Grandma, you need to make sure that the kids’ eating and sleeping schedules are put into the plan first. You work around their schedule, and guess what? If you have to drop a workout or miss reading for Book Club, you’ll be fine. It’s worth it. If you want to stick to your routine that badly, reconsider the vacation. Vacations are supposed to be all about breaking routines, good or bad.

3. Review the activities you might be able to do in advance, particularly at a resort or camp. Not all activities are available for all age groups, and might require extra ticketing or equipment. Get up early and get in line first thing; the day is less hot, and you’ll make sure to fit in the most important activities. We enjoyed many different activities at Blue Mountain Village, including a mountain roller coaster, low ropes, a ball run, mini golf, an aquatic centre (Plunge) as well as regular pools and hot tubs. There were activities for older kids like ziplining and rock wall climbing. We also took a gondola ride up to the top of the mountain (which is a ski hill in the winter).

5. Bring some easy-to-pack arts and crafts for the kids, age relatable. Markers, crayons, some blank paper or notebook, stickers, etc. They don’t need more toys; think more disposable crafts no one has to take home with them.

6. Bring a few (parent-approved) snacks. They can be things only Grandmas get away with (candy, for example), but make sure Mom and Dad know you’re bringing it and agree on the best time to give it to them.

7. Plan meals in advance. Our suite had a full kitchen, which was ideal for both breakfast and lunch, which can be expensive and, let’s face it, a lot of work for the grownups. We planned dinners out, but not before scanning the menus and making sure we could get what we wanted (my daughter and her kids are all vegan), at the price we wanted, and that the restaurants were sufficiently noisy and obviously family friendly. We ordered immediately and took full advantage of the crayons and colouring sheets offered. (My grandkids don’t have or use iPads, phones, or other electronic devices yet.) We ordered meals for the kids they could share, as typically even Kids Meals are way too much for a four-year-old to eat.

8. Have dessert back at the room, if possible. This is also an incentive to get back up to the room quietly in the hallways. Bedtime is the kids’ bedtime, generally speaking. Of course, quietly watching a show or reading a book is fine, but don’t expect to sit up all night catching up with your grown kids. They’re exhausted, you’re exhausted, and unless the kids can sleep through everything, an animated discussion could wake them up. Take the time in the evenings when it’s quiet to get ready for the next day – there’s always a lunch to be made, clothes to be washed or tickets to be bought.

Multigenerational trips can be fantastic, but the grandparents are the ones who have to make the necessary adjustments in order for it to be less stressful for the parents as well as the kids. It’s probably been a while since you had younger kids underfoot, so it’s easy to forget how all-consuming it is. Give your kids a break by acting as an assistant, not the boss. It’ll be easier for everyone.

Blue Mountain Village in Collingwood, Ontario, Canada is a special place for me and my kids. We brought them here skiing frequently when they were growing up, and two of them have been employed here as ski and snowboard instructors. Bringing my grandkids to a place I know super well has been extremely convenient and nostalgic for both me and my daughter. Reach back into your vacation memory bank when planning your own multigenerational vacation.

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